Posts by Harville & Helen

Formula For A Perfect Marriage

Formula For A Perfect Marriage

By Harville & Helen / 06/07/2021

For the past 30 years, we have searched for the formula for the perfect marriage. Our subjects were hundreds of couples in our workshops and therapy sessions whom we asked to describe their dream marriage. “If your relationship was ‘just right,’” we asked, “what behaviors would you engage in and what adjectives would you use...

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Stay In The Canoe And Paddle

Stay In The Canoe And Paddle

By Harville & Helen / 04/06/2021

The question we are asked most often is: “what do you do if your partner doesn’t…..(do any imaginable thing!) or “what if you are married to someone who is…..(any imaginable bad trait or behavior).” In the past we have responded to these questions with answers addressed to the specifics. As we have listened to my...

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Your Partner Is Not You!

By Harville & Helen / 01/28/2021

If you are still waiting and wishing that your partner would just see the light and behave in the way you that think he or she should, then you are living a fantasy. Most of us live with a figment of our imagination rather than the real flesh and blood person who is our partner....

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How to Reconnect After a Rupture

By Harville & Helen / 11/03/2020

In today’s increasingly image-based culture, it’s easy to feel like everyone has the perfect relationship – everyone but you, that is. Even the most idyllic relationships experience negativity and inevitable ruptures in connectivity. As noted in Getting the Love You Want, “Negativity is any thought, word, or deed that tells your partner, “You’re not OK...

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5 Tips for Relationships in the Midst of Coronavirus Times

5 Tips for Relationships in the Midst of Coronavirus Times

By Harville & Helen / 08/24/2020

As couples find themselves at home now more than ever before due to the COVID-19 pandemic, many relationships are feeling the strain. Work-related stress, childcare difficulties, interrupted routines and lack of social connections compound the difficulty of these uncertain times, leading overwhelmed partners to interacting from a place of frustration. Struggling for a way to...

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Barriers To Intimacy

Barriers to Intimacy© Quiz

By Harville & Helen / 04/28/2020

Love is something we’re all after. Whether it’s gaining it or maintaining it, however, love can feel elusive at times. But why is this? What might block one from experiencing the love meant for his or her own life? In their book, Receiving Love, Harville Hendrix, Ph.D. and Helen LaKelly Hunt, Ph.D. identify this common...

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Ten Tips for a Great Marriage

By Harville & Helen / 02/14/2020

In the spirit of Valentine’s Day, Harville Hendrix and his wife Helen LaKelly Hunt have distilled simple steps to help couples on the journey to the relationship of their dreams. Practice these ten tips for a great marriage, and they will take you on a journey to a wondrous love.

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